And Ther’ll Be No More Pissin’ in Me Garten

……unsere Grünfläche und den Hof nicht als Toilette benutzen. .... Diese ist nicht hygienischen. .... Danke, Hausmeister

Der Toilette: do
The lift the seat up and put it back down rule has been taken to the next level in Germany: women have forbidden all vertical peeing by and large! Yes this means that men have to such up their dignity and sit to pee. In my previous dorm residence I had no problem completely ignoring this rule, but alas as my new house is cosier, I have obliged.

Der Hof:
An added benefit to most German buildings is that they all include courtyards on the inside that are in sense private parks for the residents of the building. These courtyards also serve as a place to store the garbage bins and bikes. Mine is a plain courtyard with a bit of shrubbery, but with large a grass area.

Die Kombination:
When I came home late one night I decided it would be polite to not to wake my roommates up buy crashing around in the bathroom, flushing the toilet, etc., and relieve myself in the courtyard. This also provided me the opportunity to reassert my manhood by both standing to pee and marking territory. Being from Kansas, a place with many large open spaces, this seemed innocent enough.

Die Beachtung:
Translation of the note found in the entryway:
… Our green space and the courtyard are not to be used as a toilette. …. This is not sanitary. …. Thanks, The Housemaster

I resisted the urge to educate the housemaster to the fact that urine is one of the most sterile of natural substances.* So once again I must tuck my tail, and comply with the German way of life. (Or at least when my roommates are at home!)

GpoD:
Mann sollte den Regeln während in Deutschland folgen. – When in Germany you should follow the rules.


*This fact is conformable here. Also from the same googling** came this site which seems like a far more legitimate source to me.

**Yes ‚to google’ is now officially a verb confirmable by Webster's New Millennium™ Dictionary of English here.